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Monday, April 11, 2011

wait and wait

Major emotional problems there is with assisted conception

You build your hope so high because you think it's gonna work coz you have some sort of a help from someone who is an expert and at the end of the cycle, You ended up crying like crazy because the result is negative and you have to go through everything again next cycle.

I have gotten treatment from 3 different doctors in 6 months - time and it's either they failed me, or I failed myself. This time around, I chose not to let myself believe that it's gonna work that easy because no matter how good the chances are, still neither me, the doctor, my husband, or my family can control. It is up to Allah swt.

I am now 6 days prior to the day my period should due and everyday is a challenge for me. I try my very best to keep my self busy and not to expect anything, but god knows deep in my heart, I am so hoping that this month is the end of all this process and in 8 months time, someone will call me mommy.

But if Allah swt choose to continue to test me, I am more than willing to wait and not give up hope.

8 comments:

Apple+Susu said...

amy.. byak2 bersabar ye... Allah maha mengetahui... sue doakan amy berjaya.

one BABY-step at a time said...

tq sue..emy pun sama harap su x payah try banyak banyak kali...ape doc suh, buat aje.asalkan kite ade anak.hehehe

shaLiciOus said...

sis..banyak2kan rilex n tenangkan diri..jangan stress2 pikirkan suma nie..sebab nanti stress susah..sha pun penah mengalami saat2 getir camnie..sampai satu part tu sha dah give up..dah tak nak g jumpa doc, dah xnk buat apa2..tapi a month pastu sha dah preggy..alhamdulillah..jadi, kesimpulan..jangan stress2 ok..pasti ada rezeki nanti..

one BABY-step at a time said...

sha, iyelah org slalu kata dia akan dtg wakru kita x pikir pasal dia.tp kan nk bg x pikir tu memerlukan azam yg tinggi tu..huhu..doakan i cpt dpt baby ye.tq sha.

yong ibu chem said...

pernah rasa apa yg amy rasa. pernah rasa betapa 'sakit' nya diri ketika itu.

insyaAllah, Allah Maha Mengetahu apa yang terbaik buat kita..

AiniQMY said...

udah..jgn di pikir kan lagik...pegi tgk wayang bersama kublai khan kamu.....dan berseronoklah... kamu tak mungkin boleh tipu hati dan perasaan kamu, tapi aku percaya kamu lebih kuat dari ape yg kamu fikirkan...
Love you :)

shaLiciOus said...

sha doakan sis pun akan preggy jugak..insyaAllah..yang penting, bz kan diri dengan supink..kelas2 mekap ke, kelas masak ke..konpom ah tak ingat pasai anak..hehehe

one BABY-step at a time said...

yong : terima kasih,,harap x berpanjanganlah perasaan ni kan.

aini : ooh aini, kamu ni pandai aje mmbuat ak rasa kuat kan secara tibe tibe..thanks ye

sha : hahaha...baiklah. akan diusahakan ke kelas kelas untuk lupakan psl baby.

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