Assalamualikum...
Hati gembira rasanya bile period yang ditunggu tunggu akhirnya datang jugak
30.01.12 nanti kena jumpa doc untuk tengok egg follicle.
If everything goes well boleh la buat IUI 3rd pada 01.02.12
02.02.12 saya akan ke korea tapi hubby tak ikut. Pegi dengan family atas urusan bisnes. Cuma mengharapkan "bala tentera" time buat IUI tu berkerja keras. Nak tolong tambah, masa pulak tak cukup.
Mula mula berbincang dengan hubby, memang malas sangat rasanya nak cuba cycle ni sebab masa sangat terhad. Tapi pikir pikir balik daripada waste cycle ni, lebih baik cube. Kalau tak dapat tak ape. *wah,bukan main cakap besor, time datang period esok, aku jugak yang meroyan* hihihi ;-)
Anyway, we just have to try and pray for the best.
Sunday, January 22, 2012
Thursday, December 15, 2011
laparoscopic ovarian drill
Assalamualaikum
11.12.11 : Malam lepas balik keje hubby dah siap pack baju, tuala, berus gigi, sabun, smua lah dalam bag sementara saya termenung mengenang nasib...cee wahh , tak lah saya tak de mood nak kemas sebab terlalu susah hati memikirkan ape nak jadi esok. Saya tak pernah masuk hospital, tak pernah sakit teruk apetah lagi nak main bedah bedah ni kan...so agak gementar disitu walupun hanya minor surgery.
12.12.11 : Bangun awal pagi dalam kul 5.30 pagi. Solat Subuh sama sama, mandi dan bersiap nak pegi offer perut utk ditebuk lubang. turun aje kat bawah mama duduk kat kerusi, dah menitik air mata. Dari semalam lagi mama dah nangis. Mama kata " nanti emy sakit" saya tak tau nak pujuk macam mana sebab saya pun takut sakit, saya pun rasa nak nangis jadi saya jawab " tapi kalu emy buat ni, emy dapat anak, emy tak yah nangis lagi dah".
So, off to the hospital. Register kat kaunter terus nurse bawak masuk bilik. Masa masuk bilik tu dah dekat pukul 8 pagi. Lepak la kat bilik menunggu orang panggil nak masuk Operation theatre tu. Pukul 9 pagi tak de jugak nurse panggil pun. Makin lama duduk dalam bilik wad tu makin resah dan susah hati kalu boleh nk buat benda ni kasi habis cepat cepat. Dekat pukul 10 nurse masuk cakap doc dah ready.fuhhhh..ini bukan fuhhh lega tapi fuhhhh menarik napas panjang untuk menenangkan diri sendiri.
Tukar pada pakaian sepital dan nurse cuci pusat dan check sama ada shave ke tak. So ni lah rupenye menanti disorong keluar wad ke OT.
Masa tengah kena sorong ni, mama nangis giler giler sampai kena suruh adik teman mama dan saya tak bagi mama ikut turun.sampai takat lift aje. Hubby turun sekali teman sampai lah nurse kata "encik tunggu kat luar ye". Dalam bilik tu saya kena tukar katil yang kecik tu, katil saya yang besar ni dari wad kena letak kat luar. Bila dah kat dalam tu kena tunggu kejap. Beberapa katil beratur di tepi saya. Tunggu giliran agaknya.
Akhirnya saya disurung masuk ke dalam. Saya kena tukar baring atas katil untuk operate tu. Sangat kecil. Almaklum lah dah saya gemuk, katil tu jadi kecik lah. Tangan kanan kena letak di sisi, tangan kiri pulak kena stretch ke tepi untuk di masukkan bius. Masa di lekatkan segala alat nk monitor jantung tu saya masih sedar. tapi bila doc kata "ok, now we are going to put u to sleep" that is the last thing I heard. lepas tu gone!!!
Terjaga dekat pukul 12 tengahari. Saya dah keluar Operation room tu, tapi masih lagi kena monitor kat dalam room satu lagi. Masa bukak mata tu macam masih laloq lagi lah, kejap sedar kejap tertidor balik. Saya gagah kan diri, bulatkan mata, saya tanya nurse dah selesai ke, dua kali saya tanya just to be sure. Mata mmg rasa mcm nak tutup tapi kepala otak dah macam macam pikir. Telinga ni pulak semua benda boleh dengar tapi mata je tak nak bukak. Masa tu dalam pikiran cuma lah " tolong lah aku nak keluar so that aku boelh tengok muka laki aku ngan family aku" .
Tak lama lepas tu saya disorong keluar dan ditukar kan balik atas katil wad saya. Sakit rasa tetibe kurang dapat tgk hubby and adik kat luar senyum kat saya. Masuk dalam bilik pun masih sama, macam diawang awangan. Kejap tido kejap jaga.
Saya minum air sebaik sampai kat wad sebab terlalu haus dan lapar. Elok aje lepas minum tu saya muntah balik. Saya tidor dan bila saya bangun saya cuba minum milo dan air, tapi masih muntah. Dalam pukul 6 saya dah boleh ke toilet tapi hubby kena tolong sorongkan besi drip. Kena tolong bukakan dan pakaikan panty, tolong jirus air dan lap dengan tissue paper. Keluar darah banyak ketul ketul. Iodin warna kuning dan dye warna biru pun keluar jugak sampai lah ke esokkan pagi baru tak de bleeding dah.
Petang doc datang kat wad, doc kata saya kena makan soft diet dulu. Try makan buah dan roti. So malam tu saya hanya makan buah anggur dan roti salmon coffe bean dan saya tak muntah.
Doc tebuk 3 lubang satu di pusat, dan dua lagi di sebelah kiri dekat dengan ovari. Dua lubang dekat ovari tu tak sakit sangat, yang sakit cuma kat pusat tu. Pergerakkan kena slow slow. Nak bangun dan duduk dari kerusi atau katil memang azab.
13.12.11 : Sudah beransur sihat. Makan pun dah boleh makan macam macam cuma tak makan nasi aje. Hubby a.k.a "nurse misai" tolong mandikan saya pagi tu, siap semua pakaikan baju dan sikat rambut. Yang paling klakar bila kena ikat rambut saya.Dah rupe nenek kebayan rambut saya. hentam saja lah.... pegi toilet pun still kena hubby tolong.
Oh ye, terima kasih pada the whole family for the gifts as well as management and staff of Riamoda Silk House
Doc datang dalam pukul 10 pagi dan saya dah boleh discharge...wahhh syoknye rasa. Makin lama duduk hospital makin sakit rasanya bukan makin sihat. Settlekan bil smua, amik ubat dan saya balik rumah...yeay!!
11.12.11 : Malam lepas balik keje hubby dah siap pack baju, tuala, berus gigi, sabun, smua lah dalam bag sementara saya termenung mengenang nasib...cee wahh , tak lah saya tak de mood nak kemas sebab terlalu susah hati memikirkan ape nak jadi esok. Saya tak pernah masuk hospital, tak pernah sakit teruk apetah lagi nak main bedah bedah ni kan...so agak gementar disitu walupun hanya minor surgery.
12.12.11 : Bangun awal pagi dalam kul 5.30 pagi. Solat Subuh sama sama, mandi dan bersiap nak pegi offer perut utk ditebuk lubang. turun aje kat bawah mama duduk kat kerusi, dah menitik air mata. Dari semalam lagi mama dah nangis. Mama kata " nanti emy sakit" saya tak tau nak pujuk macam mana sebab saya pun takut sakit, saya pun rasa nak nangis jadi saya jawab " tapi kalu emy buat ni, emy dapat anak, emy tak yah nangis lagi dah".
So, off to the hospital. Register kat kaunter terus nurse bawak masuk bilik. Masa masuk bilik tu dah dekat pukul 8 pagi. Lepak la kat bilik menunggu orang panggil nak masuk Operation theatre tu. Pukul 9 pagi tak de jugak nurse panggil pun. Makin lama duduk dalam bilik wad tu makin resah dan susah hati kalu boleh nk buat benda ni kasi habis cepat cepat. Dekat pukul 10 nurse masuk cakap doc dah ready.fuhhhh..ini bukan fuhhh lega tapi fuhhhh menarik napas panjang untuk menenangkan diri sendiri.
Tukar pada pakaian sepital dan nurse cuci pusat dan check sama ada shave ke tak. So ni lah rupenye menanti disorong keluar wad ke OT.
Akhirnya saya disurung masuk ke dalam. Saya kena tukar baring atas katil untuk operate tu. Sangat kecil. Almaklum lah dah saya gemuk, katil tu jadi kecik lah. Tangan kanan kena letak di sisi, tangan kiri pulak kena stretch ke tepi untuk di masukkan bius. Masa di lekatkan segala alat nk monitor jantung tu saya masih sedar. tapi bila doc kata "ok, now we are going to put u to sleep" that is the last thing I heard. lepas tu gone!!!
Terjaga dekat pukul 12 tengahari. Saya dah keluar Operation room tu, tapi masih lagi kena monitor kat dalam room satu lagi. Masa bukak mata tu macam masih laloq lagi lah, kejap sedar kejap tertidor balik. Saya gagah kan diri, bulatkan mata, saya tanya nurse dah selesai ke, dua kali saya tanya just to be sure. Mata mmg rasa mcm nak tutup tapi kepala otak dah macam macam pikir. Telinga ni pulak semua benda boleh dengar tapi mata je tak nak bukak. Masa tu dalam pikiran cuma lah " tolong lah aku nak keluar so that aku boelh tengok muka laki aku ngan family aku" .
Tak lama lepas tu saya disorong keluar dan ditukar kan balik atas katil wad saya. Sakit rasa tetibe kurang dapat tgk hubby and adik kat luar senyum kat saya. Masuk dalam bilik pun masih sama, macam diawang awangan. Kejap tido kejap jaga.
Ni masa baru sampai wad lepas operate
Saya minum air sebaik sampai kat wad sebab terlalu haus dan lapar. Elok aje lepas minum tu saya muntah balik. Saya tidor dan bila saya bangun saya cuba minum milo dan air, tapi masih muntah. Dalam pukul 6 saya dah boleh ke toilet tapi hubby kena tolong sorongkan besi drip. Kena tolong bukakan dan pakaikan panty, tolong jirus air dan lap dengan tissue paper. Keluar darah banyak ketul ketul. Iodin warna kuning dan dye warna biru pun keluar jugak sampai lah ke esokkan pagi baru tak de bleeding dah.
Petang doc datang kat wad, doc kata saya kena makan soft diet dulu. Try makan buah dan roti. So malam tu saya hanya makan buah anggur dan roti salmon coffe bean dan saya tak muntah.
Doc tebuk 3 lubang satu di pusat, dan dua lagi di sebelah kiri dekat dengan ovari. Dua lubang dekat ovari tu tak sakit sangat, yang sakit cuma kat pusat tu. Pergerakkan kena slow slow. Nak bangun dan duduk dari kerusi atau katil memang azab.
Saya ade CD opeartion tu doc bagi. Sama aje macam yang dapat kite tengok dalam youtube. Segan pulak nak upload dalam ni, so sape sape yang berminat kot kot nak tengok, bagi tau, nanti saya boleh email. Ovari saya hanya ada satu sahaja yang kena drill tu. Sebelah lagi kecil. Doc kata yang kecik tu lah sepatutnya saiz ovari yang sebenarnya. Tiub semua ok. Rahim pun ok.
13.12.11 : Sudah beransur sihat. Makan pun dah boleh makan macam macam cuma tak makan nasi aje. Hubby a.k.a "nurse misai" tolong mandikan saya pagi tu, siap semua pakaikan baju dan sikat rambut. Yang paling klakar bila kena ikat rambut saya.Dah rupe nenek kebayan rambut saya. hentam saja lah.... pegi toilet pun still kena hubby tolong.
Oh ye, terima kasih pada the whole family for the gifts as well as management and staff of Riamoda Silk House
Doc datang dalam pukul 10 pagi dan saya dah boleh discharge...wahhh syoknye rasa. Makin lama duduk hospital makin sakit rasanya bukan makin sihat. Settlekan bil smua, amik ubat dan saya balik rumah...yeay!!
Total bill of RM 5787.95 . Consultation doc paling mahal RM 2690.00. Apekan daya harap harap lepas ni ade lah membuahkan hasil usaha kami kali ini.
Oh ye. Saya dapat MC sehingga hari jumaat. Sabtu sepatutunya kerja. Tapi dek kerana sangat bosan duduk rumah dan luka dah semakin sembuh, saya datang office.
Doc prescribe Clomid sebab mengikut doc saya akan period anytime soon, saya kena continue makan metformin dan pain killer.
Sekarang luka kat pusat dah makin ok. period saya dah datang which means saya kena start makan clomid esok. Saya ada appoinment doc 20.12.11 untuk follow up LOD ni dan 26.12.11 untuk tengok tumbesaran telur.
Saya tak pasti sejauh mana keberkesanan Ovarian drill ni. Ada sesetengah yang lepas buat berjaya pregnant dan ade jugak yang tidak. Saya cuma berharap usaha saya ni membawa satu kebahgiaan bagi saya dan hubby di masa akan datang.
Saya pun tak tau kenapa saya buat LOD ni sekarang sewaktu "money is a little bit tight" for both of us. Apa pun saya redha seandainya ini bukan usaha terakhir kami.
P/S: maaf kalau entry kali ni melalut, salah ejaan, berputar belit sebab seriously saya tengah mabuk ubat skrg ni tapi kena tulis jugak sebab takut tunggu lama lama nanti saya lupa.
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Schedule for Ovarian Drilling
Disebabkan period pun ting tong dan Doc kata saya ade Unruptured Follicle Syndrome, so, Doc suggest buat Ovarian Drill dan masa buat procedure tu boleh tengok kot kot ade perkara lain yang membuatkan tak boleh pregnant.
At first saya memamng resist sebab saya kalu dengar bab operate ni macam macam lah terbayang dlm kepal otak ni. But perhaps this is the best possible way kot. If not kalau tak pregnant jugak bulan bulan depan, hidup saya akan tetap dalam teka teki. So, might as well go for it.
Saya akan masuk wad 12/12/11 7 am . Operation at 9 am . Kalau ade kawan kawan yang pernah buat Ovarian Drill atau tau apa apa tentang ni, boleh la share skit ngan saya ye. Harap semuanya berjalan dengan lancar.
Oh ye, lupa pulak, Happy Anniversary to my dearest hubby. People can say "dah 2 tahun kawin" or " baru 2 tahun kawin" but it doesn't matter what people say coz time can never define how much I'm in love with YOU
At first saya memamng resist sebab saya kalu dengar bab operate ni macam macam lah terbayang dlm kepal otak ni. But perhaps this is the best possible way kot. If not kalau tak pregnant jugak bulan bulan depan, hidup saya akan tetap dalam teka teki. So, might as well go for it.
Saya akan masuk wad 12/12/11 7 am . Operation at 9 am . Kalau ade kawan kawan yang pernah buat Ovarian Drill atau tau apa apa tentang ni, boleh la share skit ngan saya ye. Harap semuanya berjalan dengan lancar.
Oh ye, lupa pulak, Happy Anniversary to my dearest hubby. People can say "dah 2 tahun kawin" or " baru 2 tahun kawin" but it doesn't matter what people say coz time can never define how much I'm in love with YOU
Monday, November 28, 2011
who to love more?
Saya selalu terfikir dan terbayang, jika saya ada anak, anak saya akan jadi orang paling penting dalam hidup saya melebihi semua orang. Setiap inci dan saat hidup saya untuk dia. Pernah juga terfikir maybe bila ada anak, entah entah suami pun x terlayan. *opppsss sorry b*
Baru baru ni terbaca article dalam Yahoo bertajuk
"loving the husband more than the kids is the key to good life"
I remember asking my mom when I was little who she loved best between me and my dad. "It's a different kind of love," she told me then. But the kisses she and my dad shared in the toy aisle, their constant holding hands, and their long vacations sans kids while we stayed with the grandparents told me otherwise. She loved my dad more. And I am so happy she did.
When a family is strong, mom does prioritize the marriage over the kids. But we live in a culture where kids come first. Or, as my friend recently said, "Since when did kids move from the card table at Thanksgiving to the head of the table?" Since when, indeed.
Blogger Joanna Goddard sys:
Perel believes that there's a badge of honor among American women to not prioritize yourself or your marriage: It's all about the children. Without realizing it, she said, women can end up getting their emotional intimacy and physical satisfaction from their children, instead of their partners, said Perel. They give their babies tons of wonderful affection -- and then don't have anything left over for their spouse. The marriage can become an afterthought.
Um, yep. How many women do we all know like this? It's not their fault. And I don't blame them. But it's a problem. A huge one, in fact.
The fact is, in a family, if mom and dad aren't happy, ain't nobody else happy either. The marriage should be prioritized higher than anything else.
I see it in my own family all the time. When my husband and I are happy and loving with one another, our children are happy and loving with us. They want to get in between us and cuddle and they are much calmer. After all, the marriage is the foundation of the family.
Ideally, children are born from the love two people share with one another. They grow under the umbrella of that love and then they find their own loves with whom they will do the same. Romantic love is so different (thanks mom!) than the love I feel for my children. I would die for my kids, jump in front of a train for them, and move mountains to keep them happy. But my love for my husband is different.
It's burning and passionate and sexual (one would hope!). It gets me through the hard days and sustains me when things feel low. Without him, the rest would fall apart. I know this, he knows this, and we both work very hard to maintain it. It's not easy.
My love for my children is much easier and comes more naturally and takes less work.
So in that sense, yes, my marriage is priority number one. It's what made my family and it's what will stay after my kids fly the nest.
Saya belum ada anak, jadi saya tak tau macam mana rasa orang lain yang ada anak. Tetapi saya amat bersyukur dengan kebahagiaan yang dianugerahkan pada saya. Jika saya ada anak tetapi rumahtangga saya tidak bahagia juga, saya rasa tak ada gunanya. Orang kata anak itu pengikat kasih sayang, tetapi seandainya tiada anak, namun kasih sayang masih utuh, kan lebih baik.
Baru baru ni terbaca article dalam Yahoo bertajuk
"loving the husband more than the kids is the key to good life"
I remember asking my mom when I was little who she loved best between me and my dad. "It's a different kind of love," she told me then. But the kisses she and my dad shared in the toy aisle, their constant holding hands, and their long vacations sans kids while we stayed with the grandparents told me otherwise. She loved my dad more. And I am so happy she did.
When a family is strong, mom does prioritize the marriage over the kids. But we live in a culture where kids come first. Or, as my friend recently said, "Since when did kids move from the card table at Thanksgiving to the head of the table?" Since when, indeed.
Blogger Joanna Goddard sys:
Perel believes that there's a badge of honor among American women to not prioritize yourself or your marriage: It's all about the children. Without realizing it, she said, women can end up getting their emotional intimacy and physical satisfaction from their children, instead of their partners, said Perel. They give their babies tons of wonderful affection -- and then don't have anything left over for their spouse. The marriage can become an afterthought.
Um, yep. How many women do we all know like this? It's not their fault. And I don't blame them. But it's a problem. A huge one, in fact.
The fact is, in a family, if mom and dad aren't happy, ain't nobody else happy either. The marriage should be prioritized higher than anything else.
I see it in my own family all the time. When my husband and I are happy and loving with one another, our children are happy and loving with us. They want to get in between us and cuddle and they are much calmer. After all, the marriage is the foundation of the family.
Ideally, children are born from the love two people share with one another. They grow under the umbrella of that love and then they find their own loves with whom they will do the same. Romantic love is so different (thanks mom!) than the love I feel for my children. I would die for my kids, jump in front of a train for them, and move mountains to keep them happy. But my love for my husband is different.
It's burning and passionate and sexual (one would hope!). It gets me through the hard days and sustains me when things feel low. Without him, the rest would fall apart. I know this, he knows this, and we both work very hard to maintain it. It's not easy.
My love for my children is much easier and comes more naturally and takes less work.
So in that sense, yes, my marriage is priority number one. It's what made my family and it's what will stay after my kids fly the nest.
Saya belum ada anak, jadi saya tak tau macam mana rasa orang lain yang ada anak. Tetapi saya amat bersyukur dengan kebahagiaan yang dianugerahkan pada saya. Jika saya ada anak tetapi rumahtangga saya tidak bahagia juga, saya rasa tak ada gunanya. Orang kata anak itu pengikat kasih sayang, tetapi seandainya tiada anak, namun kasih sayang masih utuh, kan lebih baik.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
postponed ;-(
IUI no 3 nampaknya terpaksa ditunda.
Saya sepatutnya start clomid hari Rabu 16.11.11 tapi pada hari rabu, period sudah tak de...yes, tak de!! Clomid sepatutnya di ambil pada hari kedua period waktu darah turun banyak, tapi kalu dah x de darah langsung, nak makan ubat macam mana.Pagi tu dah check UPT sekali lagi. Negative as usual. Sampai malam period masih x ade. So, saya amat binggung. disebabkan malam klinik dah tutup. Saya membuat andaian sendiri bahawa saya tak akan amik clomid cycle ni dan IUI kali ke 3 batal.
Pagi ni pun tak de period jugak,tapi hubby suruh call doc just to be sure what's best to be done during this confused cycle. Saya pun call doc, doc pun teragak agak jugak. last last doc kata kalau dah tak datang period and UPT negative, doc suruh makan aje clomid. but then doc kata pulak tak yah sebab who knows miracle happens. Doc suruh tunggu lagi 2 minggu sebab maybe UPT masih negative.maybe just maybe. tapi bukan ke kat kotak tu tulis 99 % accurate from the first day period due.?? ok saya pening ! if period come, then I should call the clinic and set up appoinment for IUI if I desire. If not, then just let that cycle be. Next cycle pulak lah kalau nak IUI pun.
So thats it. I am supposed to get my period on 12.11.11, but it came on the 14.11.11 from morning till evening completely just brown with very little red spots. On 15.11.11 I went to see Doc. That particular day ade keluar red spots but it is soo little that it barely touches the sanitary pad. Tak de ketul, tak de ape pun. Malam tu before tido sampai lah esok pagi nyer 16.11.11, pun sama pagi ade skit, then petang dah tak de. Today 17.11.11. tak de langsung!!
I intend to wait for my period to come and not have hope that I might be pregnant. The chances are too thin. I have let myself cried so many times before, lets hope this time I dont have to anymore.
* maaf, ter membebel pulak* isi penting = IUI 3rd time, postponed!!*
Saya sepatutnya start clomid hari Rabu 16.11.11 tapi pada hari rabu, period sudah tak de...yes, tak de!! Clomid sepatutnya di ambil pada hari kedua period waktu darah turun banyak, tapi kalu dah x de darah langsung, nak makan ubat macam mana.Pagi tu dah check UPT sekali lagi. Negative as usual. Sampai malam period masih x ade. So, saya amat binggung. disebabkan malam klinik dah tutup. Saya membuat andaian sendiri bahawa saya tak akan amik clomid cycle ni dan IUI kali ke 3 batal.
Pagi ni pun tak de period jugak,tapi hubby suruh call doc just to be sure what's best to be done during this confused cycle. Saya pun call doc, doc pun teragak agak jugak. last last doc kata kalau dah tak datang period and UPT negative, doc suruh makan aje clomid. but then doc kata pulak tak yah sebab who knows miracle happens. Doc suruh tunggu lagi 2 minggu sebab maybe UPT masih negative.maybe just maybe. tapi bukan ke kat kotak tu tulis 99 % accurate from the first day period due.?? ok saya pening ! if period come, then I should call the clinic and set up appoinment for IUI if I desire. If not, then just let that cycle be. Next cycle pulak lah kalau nak IUI pun.
So thats it. I am supposed to get my period on 12.11.11, but it came on the 14.11.11 from morning till evening completely just brown with very little red spots. On 15.11.11 I went to see Doc. That particular day ade keluar red spots but it is soo little that it barely touches the sanitary pad. Tak de ketul, tak de ape pun. Malam tu before tido sampai lah esok pagi nyer 16.11.11, pun sama pagi ade skit, then petang dah tak de. Today 17.11.11. tak de langsung!!
I intend to wait for my period to come and not have hope that I might be pregnant. The chances are too thin. I have let myself cried so many times before, lets hope this time I dont have to anymore.
* maaf, ter membebel pulak* isi penting = IUI 3rd time, postponed!!*
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
IUI second : Failed
Assalamualaikum...
IUI 2nd pada 29.10.11 hari tu memang kompem tak berjaya. Doc kata kalau ikutkan experience dia condition macam saya ni chances untuk pregnant tu tinggi.
Tapi hidup ni bukan bergantung pada ape ramalan Doc. Rezeki saya masih belum tiba.
Period sepatutnya due pada 12.11.11 tapi tak datang pada hari tu. Hati ni dah berbunga sebab sepanjang saya buat treatment, period mesti on time sama ada 28 hari @ 29 hari cycle. Tapi saya ade terbaca dalam internet, ramai yang kata kalau amik ubat utrogestan tu,(ubat yang kasi kuat rahim tu), period kite memang akan delay sehingga lah kite stop makan ubat tu. So saya rasa saya tau kenapa period saya lambat.
13.11.11 Saya pun check lah UPT negative. Sedih yang teramat sangat sampai saya tak kerja dan mintak the day off. Kami berdua terus pegi Penang sebab saya tak nak jumpa sesiapa pun. Saya nak duk sorang sorang sampai saya dah stable.
14.11.11 Masa di Penang , saya call klinik sebab jika saya tak pregnant dan masih belum datang period, adekah patut saya berhenti makan ubat tu. Doc kata jangan berhenti, makan sampai seminggu dulu bru check balik. Elok je lepas cakap ngan doc tu, period pun turun. Saya risau jugak sebab saya tak makan ubat tu malam semalam dan pagi hari ni. So saya cepat cepat balik Ipoh sebab ubat tertinggal kat ipoh. Sampai ipoh, period turun skit aje, and brown in colour. Cepat cepat makan ubat.
15.11.11 period saya masih turun dalam kadar sedikit walaupun saya dah continue makan ubat tu. Pening + confused + putus asa, saya pun jumpa doc.
Doc kata semua dah ok. Rasanya masaalah yang saya ada cuma maybe cengkerang telur saya sangat keras. Doc kata kalau saya buat IVF chances saya agak tinggi. ermmm... tak mau letak harapan tinggi sebab tak larat dah nak sedih every month.
So, saya setuju untuk buat IUI 3rd time pada 28.11.11 ni. Hari ni saya akan start makan clomid untuk 6 hari. lepas tu injection ovidrel pada 26.11.11. Tapi pada 26.11.11 nanti saya tak jumpa doc sebab doc tak ade kat klinik. So tak dapat lah nak check perkembangan telur. Saya akan terus inject ovidrel aje hari tu nanti.
Lepas ni, jika IUI kali ke 3 tak berjaya, Doc akan refer saya ke fertility center untuk proceed IVF. Kat ipoh ni tak de. Cuma ade kat KL dan penang. Rasa KL paling mudah sebab family saya ade rumah kat Subang. So mudah untuk ulang alik hospital nanti. Doc kata the best so far is Damansara fertility ( Tropicana Medical Center). Jika kawan kawan ada pandangan dan pendapat tentang IVF center kat Malaysia ni, kongsi kongsikan ye ;-) Thank you
IUI 2nd pada 29.10.11 hari tu memang kompem tak berjaya. Doc kata kalau ikutkan experience dia condition macam saya ni chances untuk pregnant tu tinggi.
Tapi hidup ni bukan bergantung pada ape ramalan Doc. Rezeki saya masih belum tiba.
Period sepatutnya due pada 12.11.11 tapi tak datang pada hari tu. Hati ni dah berbunga sebab sepanjang saya buat treatment, period mesti on time sama ada 28 hari @ 29 hari cycle. Tapi saya ade terbaca dalam internet, ramai yang kata kalau amik ubat utrogestan tu,(ubat yang kasi kuat rahim tu), period kite memang akan delay sehingga lah kite stop makan ubat tu. So saya rasa saya tau kenapa period saya lambat.
13.11.11 Saya pun check lah UPT negative. Sedih yang teramat sangat sampai saya tak kerja dan mintak the day off. Kami berdua terus pegi Penang sebab saya tak nak jumpa sesiapa pun. Saya nak duk sorang sorang sampai saya dah stable.
14.11.11 Masa di Penang , saya call klinik sebab jika saya tak pregnant dan masih belum datang period, adekah patut saya berhenti makan ubat tu. Doc kata jangan berhenti, makan sampai seminggu dulu bru check balik. Elok je lepas cakap ngan doc tu, period pun turun. Saya risau jugak sebab saya tak makan ubat tu malam semalam dan pagi hari ni. So saya cepat cepat balik Ipoh sebab ubat tertinggal kat ipoh. Sampai ipoh, period turun skit aje, and brown in colour. Cepat cepat makan ubat.
15.11.11 period saya masih turun dalam kadar sedikit walaupun saya dah continue makan ubat tu. Pening + confused + putus asa, saya pun jumpa doc.
Doc kata semua dah ok. Rasanya masaalah yang saya ada cuma maybe cengkerang telur saya sangat keras. Doc kata kalau saya buat IVF chances saya agak tinggi. ermmm... tak mau letak harapan tinggi sebab tak larat dah nak sedih every month.
So, saya setuju untuk buat IUI 3rd time pada 28.11.11 ni. Hari ni saya akan start makan clomid untuk 6 hari. lepas tu injection ovidrel pada 26.11.11. Tapi pada 26.11.11 nanti saya tak jumpa doc sebab doc tak ade kat klinik. So tak dapat lah nak check perkembangan telur. Saya akan terus inject ovidrel aje hari tu nanti.
Lepas ni, jika IUI kali ke 3 tak berjaya, Doc akan refer saya ke fertility center untuk proceed IVF. Kat ipoh ni tak de. Cuma ade kat KL dan penang. Rasa KL paling mudah sebab family saya ade rumah kat Subang. So mudah untuk ulang alik hospital nanti. Doc kata the best so far is Damansara fertility ( Tropicana Medical Center). Jika kawan kawan ada pandangan dan pendapat tentang IVF center kat Malaysia ni, kongsi kongsikan ye ;-) Thank you
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Inspirational Thoughts ; maybe this could help
While browsing through the internet for Inspirational Quotes for Infertility, I found this wonderful poem. Thought it will be nice to share this with other TTC friends. So here it is ;
Thoughts on becoming a mother
There are women that become mothers without effort,
Without thought,
Without patience or loss
And though they are good mothers and love their children,
I know that I will be better.
I will be better not because of genetics,
Or money or that I have read more books,
But because I have struggles and toiled for this child.
I have longed and I have waited.
I have cried and prayed.
I have endure and planned over and over again.
Like most things in life,
The people who truly have appreciation are those who have struggled to attain their dreams.
I will notice everything about my child.
I will take time to watch my child sleep, explore and discover.
I will marvel at this miracle everyday for the rest of my life.
I will be happy when I wake up in the middle of the night to the sound of my child,
Knowing that I can comfort, hold and feed him,
And that I am NOT
waking to another tenperature, pop another pill, take another shot or cry tears of a broken dreams.
My dream will be crying for me.
I count myself lucky in this sense;
That god has given me this insight,
This special vision with which I look upon my child that my friends will not see.
Whether I parent a child I actually give birth to,
Or a child that God leads me to.
I will not be careless with my love.
I will be a bettermother for all that I have endure.
I am a better wife, a better aunt, a better daughter, neighbor, friend, and sister because I know pain.
I know disillusionment as I have been betrayed by my own body,
I have been tried by fire and hell many never face, yet given time,
I stood tall.
I have prevailed,
I have succeeded,
I have won.
So now, when others hurt around me.
I do not run from their pain in order to save myself discomfort.
I see it, I mourn it, and join them in theirs.
I listen and even though I cannot make it better,
I can make it less lonely.
I have learned the immerse power of another hand holding tight to mine,
Of other eyes that moisten as they learn to accept the harsh truth and when life is beyond hard.
I have learned compassion that only comes with walking in those shoes.
I have learned to appreciate life.
Yes, I will be a wonderful mother.
"taken from : trinigirl2010(ivillage member)"
My Intention is just to share, sorry if it offense any party.
Thoughts on becoming a mother
There are women that become mothers without effort,
Without thought,
Without patience or loss
And though they are good mothers and love their children,
I know that I will be better.
I will be better not because of genetics,
Or money or that I have read more books,
But because I have struggles and toiled for this child.
I have longed and I have waited.
I have cried and prayed.
I have endure and planned over and over again.
Like most things in life,
The people who truly have appreciation are those who have struggled to attain their dreams.
I will notice everything about my child.
I will take time to watch my child sleep, explore and discover.
I will marvel at this miracle everyday for the rest of my life.
I will be happy when I wake up in the middle of the night to the sound of my child,
Knowing that I can comfort, hold and feed him,
And that I am NOT
waking to another tenperature, pop another pill, take another shot or cry tears of a broken dreams.
My dream will be crying for me.
I count myself lucky in this sense;
That god has given me this insight,
This special vision with which I look upon my child that my friends will not see.
Whether I parent a child I actually give birth to,
Or a child that God leads me to.
I will not be careless with my love.
I will be a bettermother for all that I have endure.
I am a better wife, a better aunt, a better daughter, neighbor, friend, and sister because I know pain.
I know disillusionment as I have been betrayed by my own body,
I have been tried by fire and hell many never face, yet given time,
I stood tall.
I have prevailed,
I have succeeded,
I have won.
So now, when others hurt around me.
I do not run from their pain in order to save myself discomfort.
I see it, I mourn it, and join them in theirs.
I listen and even though I cannot make it better,
I can make it less lonely.
I have learned the immerse power of another hand holding tight to mine,
Of other eyes that moisten as they learn to accept the harsh truth and when life is beyond hard.
I have learned compassion that only comes with walking in those shoes.
I have learned to appreciate life.
Yes, I will be a wonderful mother.
"taken from : trinigirl2010(ivillage member)"
My Intention is just to share, sorry if it offense any party.
BTW meet : Nur Najwa Janatulnaim binti Abdullah
Nur Najwa Jannatulnaim bt Abdullah ( 3 bulan ) . Ditinggalkan ibu kandung seorang Indonesia beragama Kristian dan di Islamkan oleh ibu angkat dia Ibu Fadzilah, Pengurusi Rumah Anak Anak Yatim An Nur Maisarah.
Hati sangat terpaut dengan Najwa tapi dia dah ade keluarga. Jika tidak, saya mungkin tak mampu lepaskan dia. Insyaallah rezeki saya akan tiba nanti. Amin Ya Rabbal Alamin.
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